I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
