Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I just want nice things and good sex
I am naked and annoyed.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
