My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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