You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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