i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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