Whoa Z and x make the same sound
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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