ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Randomize
