I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
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