The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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