Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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