I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
My vagina just clenched in fear
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
