so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
