im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
