well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
