I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I have so many feelings about this burrito
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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