If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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