then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
