Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Randomize
