did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
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