I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize