I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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