My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
