Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
time to smoke my breakfast
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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