the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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