i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
