How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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