my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
