just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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