when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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