The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
