Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
