What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
