pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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