Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize