I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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