Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
