I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
How does one acquire holy water?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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