Tell her she can't have a vagina
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Randomize