We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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