Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
this will be a night to untag.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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