Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
