GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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