the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
