scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
