Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
