i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
