I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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