There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize