Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
