did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
