yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
